History

Before Birth:

Ahmad was my first child. He was born naturally after 8 years of infertility. I had 5 failed round of IVF and numerous failed IUI's. After the failure of all medical treatments, he was conceived and delivered naturally.

After Birth:

Ahmad suffered with severe colic and tummy problems till 4 months of age. He was exclusively breastfed and that's why his health was very good. He crawled a bit late at 9 months and walked properly at 16 months of age. We love to play cricket with him, with cars sending back and forth, and games like hide and seek, peek a boo etc. He was saying few words till age 18 months old and then lost the speech after he became sick with viral infections and ear infections one after other.

Autism Kicked Inn:

From 18 months of age Ahmad started losing weight and started behaving differently. He was lining up cars in order and making same colour block towers. Spinning and tip toe walk was another hobby. He stopped paying attention when we call him. Crying and screaming in nursery play groups were a daily routine. Giving him bath was the most difficult thing. Eye contact was very poor.

He kept losing weight and remained sick for 6 to 8 months. Finally he was diagnosed with Celiac Disease around 30 months of age.

His Sleep:

This was the major issue for us. After leaving breastfeeding at 18 months he never slept through the night. Waking up 3 to 4 times were a usual routine. It takes 30 to 40 mints to put him back to sleep. Me or mostly my husband walk while holding him on his shoulder till he goes to sleep. That was making us very tired, we were sleep deprived. My husband works full time as a software engineer from 9am till 5pm and drive 40 mints one way for work. This all was very tiring for him.
Meantime I fell pregnant with my second child, she was born when Ahmad was 28 months old.

Road To Autism Diagnosis:

We put him on gluten free diet and his symptoms improved a bit. He was seen by pediatrician at 28 months of age with no conclusive results. We had his hearing evaluated too which was fine.

A speech therapist was seeing him every 2 weeks with no success at all. He became completely non verbal. Echo sounds were his only vocal sounds.

Nursery was started at 35 months of age. He does not play or show interest in any other kid. He has no idea how to play with toys appropriately. His interests were and still are in things like hair pins, a part of any toy, a box lid, an alphabet letter or a colour pencil. He would like to hold one of these things in his hand all the time. He started grinding teeth at 3 years of age and like to touch and feel things. He would feel a bump on a wall or any raised surface. 

He was seen by same paediatrician again at 3 years of age who told us our son is probably autistic kid and referred us to Autism diagnosis panel of doctors for final Label.

My Thoughts As A Mother:

From 19 months of age I knew something went wrong with him and I kept visiting GP's. I was swinging between Autism and Global developmental delay all that time. Whatever it was I thought it will be over in few months and he will start talking again. If few minor issues like hand flapping and head banging stays still nothing to worry as he will learn to overcome on those when he will grow up. He was a typical child and I was hoping he will be back to that point soon. But to my disappointment he never started talking even a single word apart from echo type noises.
Even though I knew from months and kept searching about Autism still paediatrician statement shattered me completely. When I asked him what can we do about it. Can anything make him better? He replied No. The only thing you can do is train him as best as you can.

I cried for a day and then decided to take things in my own hand. I am a Muslim and my firm believe is anything can be happen with prayers. When my all IVF and medical treatment failed then I came back to God saying now only you can do it. Even though I was praying and asking during medical treatment too but then I had trust on doctors and on advanced treatments too. When all advanced treatments failed then I was up in middle of night saying now nothing can be done, I will never be a mother. My heart was really crying and saying nothing left, nothing can be done now. Allah said behold and see what I can do. Next month I conceived my lovely son.

Hence I decided to pray again and do whatever I could do leaving the result to God. To be honest Now I came to the opinion that doctors know nothing about Autism. Not the cause not the treatment. You have to be your child 's doctor. A mother know all about her child which even a doctor do not know.  There was something that triggered Ahmad brain and led it to Autism. He was not born this way. Yes he was delayed but fulfilled and completed everything even bit late than typical children. Whatever covered his brain I have to remove that and for that I started reading everything I can find about Autism. There were many treatments on internet but to me safety of my child is the first preference. Never use anything before searching its dangers and side effects. Like there is some miracle mineral solution campaign which has many health side effects and dangerous for children. You don't want to harm your child as Autistic healthy child is better than a sick child. Autism is just a condition and many people living great life, its just I wanted my Ahmed back to a typical child. Please don't take any offence if you have autistic child as I mean none to be honest.
Anyway I spoke to my son's early years forum key worker who is a very nice lady and told her I don't want to label my son at this age. I need an year or two so I can work with him to improve his life. She asked me to fill a parent comment form and write my thoughts on it and send to them. Which I did.

Later with pessage of time his issues became worse. He will hold a seed and could spent whole day looking at it moving between his fingers. He could find any small bumps on surfaces and will keep feeling it for hours. Drooling started. Eating became a hobby, and it has to be carbs. He loves YouTube in any other language than English or Urdu. Hand flapping and stamping, tiptoes head banging all were present. Flashing lights will mesmerize him and he starts to spin and jump. He joined mainstream nursery but he was unable to cope at mainstream school. We applied for EHCP and put him in special Autism school.

My next post will be his progress till now.